There's one thing that I would love to add to this beautiful piece as stated by Jay Asooli, an intersectional relationship coach, "It’s important to name here that for women/nonmen, the crux of the reason we over-function, or carry disproportionate cognitive, emotional, domestic load is systemic, a function of patriarchal capitalism that devalues women/nonmen’s unpaid labour, while said labour bolsters men’s ability to progress in the workplace, make and, in many ways, hoard money and critical resources such as sleep, leisure and free time at women/nonmen’s expense."
It's important to understand that the role of the "caregiver" is intentional patriarchal conditioning so as to distance one's self from self-blame when that realisation about how one acted prior to avoid what I call "patriarchy-induce shame."
As an elder daughter who has been through this journey of measuring my worth by how much useful I am to others in their journey, this post embraced me with warmth as I am emerging on the other side - nourishing myself and finding interdependence. Thank you!
I love the term 'interdependence' and I love the examples that you give to show how it differs from codependence. It's so much healthier and realistic.
This is so important. I always think I have this mastered, but then, I only think of it around romantic relationships, and I've ultimately decided that I simply can't handle romantic relationship. Problem solved, right? Not really. Plus I'm still nowhere near healed when it comes to dealing with codependency among family and friends.
Thank you for sharing this series. Being in my first healthy romantic relationship this year has made me think a lot about the unhealthy messages I’ve heard and unknowingly abided by for most of my life. Yikes!
Celebrating you in entering that first healthy romantic relationship!! I so know what that feels like and all of the unpacking that comes along with it.
There's one thing that I would love to add to this beautiful piece as stated by Jay Asooli, an intersectional relationship coach, "It’s important to name here that for women/nonmen, the crux of the reason we over-function, or carry disproportionate cognitive, emotional, domestic load is systemic, a function of patriarchal capitalism that devalues women/nonmen’s unpaid labour, while said labour bolsters men’s ability to progress in the workplace, make and, in many ways, hoard money and critical resources such as sleep, leisure and free time at women/nonmen’s expense."
It's important to understand that the role of the "caregiver" is intentional patriarchal conditioning so as to distance one's self from self-blame when that realisation about how one acted prior to avoid what I call "patriarchy-induce shame."
As an elder daughter who has been through this journey of measuring my worth by how much useful I am to others in their journey, this post embraced me with warmth as I am emerging on the other side - nourishing myself and finding interdependence. Thank you!
Hi Margeaux,
I love the term 'interdependence' and I love the examples that you give to show how it differs from codependence. It's so much healthier and realistic.
This is so important. I always think I have this mastered, but then, I only think of it around romantic relationships, and I've ultimately decided that I simply can't handle romantic relationship. Problem solved, right? Not really. Plus I'm still nowhere near healed when it comes to dealing with codependency among family and friends.
Thank you for sharing this series. Being in my first healthy romantic relationship this year has made me think a lot about the unhealthy messages I’ve heard and unknowingly abided by for most of my life. Yikes!
Celebrating you in entering that first healthy romantic relationship!! I so know what that feels like and all of the unpacking that comes along with it.